Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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