I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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