so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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