bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
