yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
