oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
