the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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