My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
