Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
