I wanna bring you to show and tell
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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