Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
