I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
