Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
