yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i just had sex bonerless
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
