I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
