im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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