I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
This couple is walking their pig around campus
The adults are the big ones right?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
