Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
