i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
