going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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