Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
