I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
