WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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