I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
