How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Randomize
