i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
