You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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