I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize