glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
