Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.

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(720): View more from Colorado

He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.

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(212): View more from New York

Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.

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(765): View more from Indiana

Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?

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(775): View more from Nevada

I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.

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(+81): View more from

His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.

(1+81): View more from

You are always hiding in a closet though??

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(551): View more from New Jersey

Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy

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