Got a toothbrush?
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Randomize