Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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