Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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