So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
