I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
