I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
