I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Randomize
