I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
