I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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