Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
