i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
