So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize