Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
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