I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
