it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Randomize
