Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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