If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
