so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
