why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
