Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize